ttim101 posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 3:09am

Good job I loved it. Even though this was a serious chp. You still had a funny part with the mer-people. Can't till the next chp.

OdinMage posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 3:08am

Despite what others may have said - given your AN at the beginning - I'm loving this story. I think the writing is great, the idea is certainly unique, and you're taking things in an interesting direction. My only real question is about how Harry was speaking in this chapter... even if he hasn't spoken English in a couple months I don't think it would have degraded his speech that much. That aside, again, a great chapter, I can't wait to see more from the Harry side of things.

noylj posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:45am

The only "bad" thing about the story is Bumble's sudden change. I don't see any one as certain of their own godhood as Bumbles accepting their failures and doing something about it. People can rationalize anything, and Bumbles more than most. Love the story. Hope Harry is having a LOT of fun at the enclave.

moontenshi posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:42am

I can't speak for anyone else but I have enjoyed reading Enslavement. When things in our life changes of course we change with it. You have reached a new place in your life and your writing is changing along with it. Don't let the reviewers with the negative messages bother you. You and your writing are growing and they are choosing to be left behind. Looking forward to whatever writing you choose to grace us with.

jmmistytamplen posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:40am

I enjoyed this very much. Harry did what anyone would do when cornered - use any means possible to get out of it. It's not his fault that everyone thought the worst of him - by this point he was used to it, I'm sure.

Will there be another chapter? Just curious to see how this will play out. If not, that's ok, too.

And thank you for sharing your vision of the HPverse with us.

Jane

michaelsuave posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:38am

Honestly? I really loved this story both first chapter and second and I don't understand why you are being so hard on yourself? Your grammar is excellent as always and the plot is new and inventive compared to the normal tripe that represents 90% of the hp fanfiction out there. In short, excellent work and I would honestly like to see a 3rd chapter that shows Harry finding love or at least satisfaction and fulfillment in his new life at the enclave. Thanks for sharing, I had been checking your site all day for this update and am glad it finally came. Cheers!

Orion posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:34am

I liked this. Fan fiction with an excessivly manipulative to outright evil Dumbledore has been much more common in recent years, but when I started reading fan fiction he was more often the good grandfatherly mentor. Either way, I've come to enjoy stories where he gets what he deserves - for good or ill.

Which is to say I like his character here. He's taken some hard blows, but he's also looked at his mistakes and made more than a token start to change things for the better.

As always, thank you for writing and sharing it with us.

Ryu Son Goku posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:31am

This was great! Thank you for enriching my life with your writing. I can only hope there is more to this story, but if not, thank you for writing what you did.

Gardengirl posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:27am

Interesting other-side view of the story. Did Albus change? Yes, I think so. Did he successfully change anything around him? Yes, I think he did, at least in the short term. He acknowledged his failure and while he couldn't make it up to Harry, he did at least take steps to prevent it ever happening again. And I did so love the repercussions upon Gryffindor House for their expulsion. Serve 'em right.

Tenchifew posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:25am

Fascinating story.

Enjoyed it a lot.

Thank you for writing.

jilumasam posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:25am

Your writing on a bad day is far better than many writing on a good day. Including mine :) It's great to see you writing again. I have this impression we won't see the big stories you used to write. But we will see smaller, more compact (focused) stories. I've enjoyed both chapters so far. I presume there is a third chapter? Looking forward to it. Enjoy work, enjoy life and enjoy writing!

Bren Antrim posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:23am

I don't care what anyone else tells you - I am thoroughly enjoying this story, and am very happy that you're writing it. Thank you.

Phynix posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:18am

Not your usual style, but very good. Both parts could use a little polishing. I can feel the anger and pain that has caused the change in your writing style. I know you won't believe me right now but things will get better. You will find happiness and joy again, eventually.

hedwig_edwiges posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:17am

I liked. For me was a different point of view and approach of bond and veelas. It's interesting to see a more ruthless side of Harry, specially because it's when the more interesting and cunning actions seems to flow. I hope that the change of pace in your life still let you publish from time to time. I enjoy what your write and thank you for that.

DaZZa posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 2:16am

I don't agree with your comments about not writing as well as you used to. This was thoroughly enjoyable, and it's good to see original stuff out of you again. Thank you for carrying on.

Lincoln posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 1:53am

I don't care what the others say in their reviews. You may not spend as much time obsessing over your writing as you once did, but the writing you still do now is eminently enjoyable.

your use of Dumbledore's point of view rounded out the story quite nicely. And I thoroughly enjoyed the coming of justice to the British Magical Community

mathiasgranger posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 1:50am

Interesting first couple of chapters, I think you mentioned a third one. I look forward to seeing that. Seeing as how everything under the sun has been done with the Potter Universe, I still find your writing to be most accessible and refreshingly different. Which is the highest praise I can give in such a case.

Thank you for writing.

Jamey posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 1:45am

I did not understand the vitriol brought out by the first chapter. It seemed to work very well for me - clear and concise. And of course, it was all from the viewpoint of Harry, so there was no way to see these happenings. In the end - I think you did a good job here. Of course your writing has changed - you've gotten older, you've gotten experience, you've lived. I hope, though, that at some point you will get the spark of enjoyment that you had. I really would like a finish to Wild Horses, though I expect Hope's Dawn and Konoha's Legion would be easier to easier to get back into. Perhaps Perfect Slytherins will fit your mood better, though.

ficbob posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 1:33am

Thanks for the wrap up of the mess at Hogwarts

I like how you had Dumbledore actually get off his butt and think instead of just going with the plan

There was much to enjoy about both chapters even if the start was dark and stormy

Thank you and I am looking forward to more fics from you

wolfey posted a comment on Monday 24th February 2014 1:24am

I dont know why you said your writing has gooten worse. I like your stories new and old. specially your naruto story and hogwarts dawn. I could beg for a xander based story as well from buffy lol.