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Reviews

Entilzah posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 5:53am

Dear Lord what a ride!

On Chapter 8:
I was completely engulfed in this chapter and realized time was passing only when I finished it and tried to collect my thoughts.

Sure this was the classic "decent into the Underworld" that every Hero with a Thousand Faces must undergo. But the journey was so fun. When Little Red Ridinghood showed up, I was mildly surprised, but thought "well, of course she did!" And I thought the same with essentially everything else that happened.

But what completely shone in this chapter was the pacing. While your Grand Vision(tm) that we first saw in _This Means War_ was towering, it also seemed a little pedantic. This version, however, had multiple people espousing an even Grander Vision(tm). Yet the little pinpricks of humor (the twins being "infamous", Gabrielle's insistance on pre-wedding ravishment) ensured that it did not get Too Much. Bravo for your growth as an author.

And for the record: Gabrielle's (I just cannot think of this Gabrielle as "Gabby." Princesses do not have a dimunitive form of their name) scene before Harry's arrival was priceless. So perfectly in character and funny to boot. Manic yet endearing.

On the Story as a Whole:
Is this my favorite fanfic ever? Well, I cannot think of one that would surpass it.

You took something that was familiar (i.e. a Fairy Tale), something that has been done countless time throughout the body of fanfiction, and made it Unique and emmensely enjoyable. You pretty much gave us exactly what we thought we were going to get, but in such a different way. You took everything to its extreme conclusions, and we "couldn’t find a single flaw in the logic of [your] theory, no matter how much a part of [us] said that it was completely illogical."

The key to the whole story was, of course. Gabrielle. I found that this was really Her Story, even though Harry was the hero. Her characterization was (as I have said countless times before) Unique, and spot on perfect. She is easily the best character in any HP fanfiction, and I am hard pressed to find any in all of the body of fiction that I have read who could match her. It was an excellent and complex characterization of a child genius, who thought she was a sociopath, who was really...

As imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, especially in the fanfiction world, many have tried to copy your unique idea of the Veela Bond from Hope. Most not so well. This Gabrielle is so unique that the only person who could or probably even would copy this would be a writer equal to your talent. And there are not that many of those out there.

The one thing that "worried" (and that is far too strong of a word) was the seemingly large portion of extemporizing that you did in this piece. But unlike the blocks of text that usually this involves, you did it in the form of conversations. But still, after thinking "wait, wait... I just lost track of time during his extemporizing because I was so enthralled... why is this a bad thing?" I decided to go with it and enjoy it for the ride.

I definitely enjoyed the way these different theories grew and evolved as more data came to light. Gabrielle thought she was completely right when she started, and so did Hermione. But as they realized they were both right, their perception of Truth evolved along with it. So often these explainations just "easily" set the ground rules for the story to proceed. Your explainations were the story.

All in all, what a wonderful story. I should be able to appreciate this for the masterful work that it is for many years to come. And to say I am looking forward to your next works (Slytherin Harry and Wednesday taken to the logical extremes you explored here? What fun!) with great anticipation would be an understatement.

Well done.

Meteoricshipyards posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 5:48am

Wonderful story. Loved McGonagall the hag.

Thank you so much for such an enjoyable story.

Tom A.

kate19 posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 5:46am

loved it!!! and i think that reading castles in the sky will be a lot of fun!!! so get to it so we can enjoy it!!! your stories always make me feel like i lost something that is dear to me, when they are finished. because they are full of fun and adventure!! so thanks for that!!

bye

Illusia posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 5:43am

Ooh, I just thought about that. About the monarchy, I mean. That was right after I got a flashback of disney's enchanted :)
I can't wait for the castle in the clouds!

KenF posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 5:16am

This was great, and your best ending ever.

I think my favorite part in this chapter was "what's for breakfast?" Acting so casual about minor things like flying castles is a perfect style for Harry.

I'm looking forward to the sequel.

Zicou posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 5:14am

Very great, awesome,
'can't wait for your new story!
continuuuuuuuuue!

Z.

Philipe posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 5:09am

Wasn't it Excalibur? Anyway, a lovely story, specially with the promise of a sequel.. But this story feels alright all on it's own. If you had stopped now, i would have been satisfied.. And i always feel that if you're not making a single story, then you can only do a trilogy. Two is not a nice number. ;)

I loved the Red Riding Hood, it was hilarious, and i like Nimue a lot, specially after Bernard Cornwell's trilogy.

The ministry will always make a good comic relief in my opinion, so i'm looking forward to that part of the story. i know it's your decision, and i made my peace with it Tim, but it's gonna be a sad day when you leave the realm.

The close this, because i do have to get back to work and using my phone for this is annoying, a perfect ending, and i loved Doris. Congrats on a another well written story. Cheers Tim!

Philipe

Ruth Smith posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 4:59am

Excellent! I loved it, nothing more to say but thanks.
Ruth

brad posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 4:05am

Well, what do you know, it *was* the psychiatrist!

Sometimes I wasn't sure how 'serious' this whole story was ... Gabrielle's kidnapping seemed to be real, but Fawkes didn't think it warranted a rescue squad and then we had Gabrielle's posing in chains (which seemed like a scene out of a Mel Brooks movie). I'm still not sure. Plot-wise, did the dwarf (a) discover the castle, (b) somehow learn of Gabrielle's existence, (c) become infatuated with her, and then (d) turn into a psychiatrist and somehow convince her parents to engage his services?

I hope Harry can recover his wand from the innards of the sword, it might be difficult to wield for up-close work in transfiguration and charms classes. :D

The big surprise here, for me, is that you actually do seem intent on making Harry and Gabrielle fair dinkum 'royalty'. Up until this last chapter I thought the whole Prince/Princess thing was just a game or mental template for Gabrielle. Camelot, of course, gives the whole notion legitimacy. I think you might be on to a winner there; how many of us have often thought "I'd make a great ruler, I would be wise and objective"? It'll be interesting to see what sort of decisions/rulings Harry & Gabrielle make in Castles in the Sky, if you're going to show us that sort of thing. If they're really sincerely honestly actually 'rulers', in charge in a government/royalty type way.

"How can you be bored with trees?" -- I loved that line. You do young children talk very well. :D

I wouldn't mind learning Harry's particular method of occlumency ... :D

Entertaining story; looking forward to 'Castles in the Air'! Thank you for this one.

jdcox61 posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 4:01am

Bravo! This is a good story, and I must say that Gabby is one of my fav characters also. Although sometimes all the fairy tale stuff had me rolling my eyes, I still enjoyed reading it.
Thanks!

brad posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 3:46am

I find it hard to believe in a 'good' or 'not evil' Narcissa. After all, she was married to a terrorist and murderer. Loyalty to and love of one's husband should only go so far, don't you think?

"Harry's invading France" -- at long last I've read that signature line of yours in its proper setting :-)

(It was a classic signature)

smog2187 posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 3:22am

What a fun read this was, the only downside is that pretty much every antagonist has no chance of winning against the prince and princess, so there are no real worries and thus no real accomplishments in the story. I am interested in seeing where you'll take the sequel as it seems to have a more interesting enemy.

Keep writing and I'll keep reading (and reviewing)

Phoenix4life posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 3:20am

Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yea-Hah!!!!!!! There is a sequel. You can't see me but I'm celebrating wildly. This was pure genius and I can't tell you how much I've loved reading this story. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.

I know I sound incredibly hyperactive but it is rare to find such a gem of a story that I could and will read over and over again.

Zvoni posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 3:17am

YOU ARE EVIL!!!
You know that?

And I'll tell you why: You had to chose Staufen Im Breisgau, Germany!!
Why is this making you evil?
Because i live in Freiburg Im Breisgau, Germany.

Staufen is some 20 Km away from me, and your evil doing was that i tried to connect this chapter to the places i know around Staufen.

AWESOME STORY!!!!

tlslick posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 2:57am

I have enjoyed this story greatly and was always looking forward to the next chapter.
It is always hard to see something like this end.I am also happy to see that another book will be coming forth.
Thank you for your time and effort!


Thanks again
Tlslick

joeBob posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 1:37am

While still a superior story, this last chapter has spun out and cheapened the whole thing somewhat. Serious shark jumpage was inflicted on we hapless readers.
This could have been reduced with better foreshadowing and a more likely connection between Camelot, van Neuman(sic) and Gabrielle.

McGonagall having Excalibur, instead of the legendary "Lady of the Lake", is a little too convenient, too.

Also, what do you have against Dr. von Neumann? Without the real von Neumann, you would never have been able to get this story out (no modern computers).

Really, the whole Camelot thing was completely unnecessary and the story could have been outstanding without it. But, the lack of proper foreshadowing, and of believable tie in to the, unneeded, deus ex machina is probably the only flaw in this tale.

Thank you for some fine entertainment.

MadMax666 posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 12:27am

Ahhh...Here there be dragons!

An excellent story. Can't wait for the sequel.

Patches posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 12:21am

Wow! This was perfect! I love the stories within the story. The fact that the ugly old witch was actually McGonagal was wonderful. It is good that Greyback got his in the end. He was definitely evil. A cranky, greedy dragon got just what it deserved. Very well done. In true fairy tale style, I might add. This is excellent. I especially like the beginning and ending with Hermione. that was excellent. Thanks so much for writing and I look forward to Castles in the Sky and more about Nimue! pms

anusha0602 posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 12:20am

Loved Loved Loved it!!! Keep writing.. I've been a (lurking) fan for many years.. :)

deathzealot posted a comment on Friday 11th July 2008 12:05am

So there will be a Sequel! Sweet! When will that be out? Next week or do we have to wait around for a bit. Anyways thanks for a wonderful story, and I eagerly await the next. Thank You.