By Jeconais
Reviews
Dracolych69 posted a comment on Tuesday 7th September 2010 4:19pm
Nice chapter! Yeah, the Hanabi thing was IC, and very cute. Who's finishing move was that? Not Scorpion, since he is known for burning them to ash. Was it Kano? Eh, ether way, it was cool. First time I've seen anyone add in stuff from Mortal Kombat into a Naruto fic, which is kinda surprising, now that I think of it.
grey_shadow_horse posted a comment on Tuesday 7th September 2010 4:06pm
Great chapter :) I loved it!
Lee Dickie posted a comment on Tuesday 7th September 2010 3:27pm
A great fun update with a more realistic approach as to what is acceptable even in a society of assasins.
ficbob posted a comment on Monday 6th September 2010 3:40am
I was enjoying the chapter as it is fun, until the end.
And the chapter ended at a cliffhanger. . . KHAN!
Great chapter, I enjoyed the fun and gifts.
I am displeased that I am not sure that Hiashi and girls are healthy.
Hoping for more soon.
And I am glad that the Professor is back
Nyghthawk28 posted a comment on Monday 6th September 2010 2:03am
This story is a whole lot of fun! ^_^
It just goes to show that the K.I.S.S. rule stands true even for ninjas.
Keep up the good work as the look forward to more zany adventures!
~Aloha
keichan2 posted a comment on Sunday 5th September 2010 8:21am
I had to read this chapter a second time: there are so much things to comment on!
"if the fit had hit the shan" it took me a good two seconds to understand what you meant, here, but it made me smile!
"Anko-chan, do you mind if I kiss you?" I'm astonished that Kakashi was surprised Naruto had a torture jutsu, but wasn't by Anko's answer to this question! ;-p
I did wonder for a time on why Naruto addressed to Haku as female, until I realized that he did that consistently when recalling the story, so I thought he had something planed (I'm happy I can still guess right ;-p)
"Sasuke, Haku’s a guy. Haku, Sasuke’s gay." I know you hinted on this when Haku didn't erupt during Naruto and Anko's display, but what if Haku wasn't gay?
"Did I remember my angst proof underwear today?" Uh? They make angst proof underwear? (and on a side note, Kyubi played along!)
"You can adopt a baby, and when we kill Itachi, we’ll take his eyes, and implant them in the baby — problem solved" :-D He spent too much time with Anko and Ibiki ;-p (Though I think it is not a solution, as I don't see how the transplanted child will be able to transmit the genetics to the next generation...)
"I’m placing Haku on your team, as Naruto’s replacement..." Without a team, how will Naruto be able to enter the Chunin exam?
"Hanabi gave him a brief hug back" I do wonder... Naruto is ignoring Hinata and places all his attentions on Hanabi... Do you intend to pair them, or will Hinata wake up?
I wonder why the Hyūga’s were so happy to sort and count Naruto's riches. I don't mean that they wouldn't want to help him, just that I find the big smiles described before such an arduous task strange...
"Give it to Tenten-chan, say you bought it for her" It shows how much trust Neji have in Naruto that he didn't insist on knowing what it was!
"You know how I promised to never lie to you?" On the other hand (and while I still think that Neji is now blindly trusting of Naruto) if it were a joke, he would be safe from her wrath. Joke aside, it speaks of honesty like I've rarely seen in real life! It's refreshing :-)
"On my stars"... As in "throwing stars"? Is she swearing on her weapons? Is she monomaniac?
"I like women who don’t play stupid games..." Forget my comment about the pairings... He is not after Hanabi or Hinata.
You didn't tell us what Kurenai got!
"and I’ve just realised that I was scammed this morning." I don't think so! It is more a case of scammer scammed... I'd say it's a draw.
"golden hair clip" Woops! I didn't spot this on first reading :-D So this is her present!
"another four of the males fainted" this game is funny to watch :-D
"Where the hell have you been for the last ten years, professor?" Wow! A decisive Hokage will make the next chapters very interesting to read :-)
Having Naruto giving lessons in sneakiness to Jounins is quite fun, though I admit that he is probably, given his childhood, the most apt to do that...
""What about Danzo?" Tsume asked." Uh? wasn't she in the office when he was killed?
"He was the first Kage in history to defeat paper work." this one was hilarious! It had me laughing for a long time!
It's kind of useful: if something bother Hanabi, she is likely to frown, and as such alert Naruto! And with the Kawaii No Jutsu, he can come immediately to help. I wonder if they detected the poison before eating it or after... (just a try to guess how much Naruto will hurt the culprits)
"Shino whistled softly." I agree! It IS a terrifying though!
"His maximum is fifteen Chunins"... so it means that Naruto IS Chunin level... will he even need to pass the exam?
"A load of level ones have just dispersed, so I got a view of the whole thing" I do hope you will tell US what happened! I can't wait to know the damages a few Naruto clones with his current level of competence can do...
Please, update soon!
jgkitarel posted a comment on Saturday 4th September 2010 6:47am
Hoo boy, you have an interesting turn here. I see Naruto probably caused a big mess amongst the Hyuga clan.
One peeve. Genin, Chunin, and Jonin don't have a plural form in Japanese. I've made similar mistakes in the past, and had them pointed out to me.
writerpayne posted a comment on Friday 3rd September 2010 8:56pm
i hate where you left that, but great chapter, Naru-Chan is showing everyone what he is truly made of and I just realised that if you brought this Naruto into a Harry Potter fic, the dark lord would be on his knees begging to be dead.
Hope you update this story soon and that you have a nice day!
jayjons posted a comment on Friday 3rd September 2010 8:56am
Can't wait for you to continue. one of the best creative!naruto stories ive ever read
lydiakate98 posted a comment on Friday 3rd September 2010 3:38am
I like Kawaii no Jutsu. I especially enjoy when Hanabi frowns that he leaps across the city to glomp. And I am assuming tha the assasination plot has been taken care of with prejudice? After all, what are Super Narutos for but to be super protective, awesome when angry Narutos?
thumper posted a comment on Friday 3rd September 2010 12:56am
I was very happy to see this story updated. I look forward to chapters of this of this story and its always a nice treat to see one.
David Thacker posted a comment on Thursday 2nd September 2010 10:03pm
Great story! I thought there was more to it also. That is how good it is.
Robert Peeples posted a comment on Thursday 2nd September 2010 9:32pm
I really enjoy reading your stories, glad to see you writing more. This one is too, too Kawaii
Philip Jacobs posted a comment on Thursday 2nd September 2010 8:01pm
Ok, I know that you're not really putting much into this story beyond writing down what your Muse offers and then a quick proofread by your beta, but I'm still getting a huge amount of enjoyment from watching the twists you have Naruto taking while on his personal journey of growth. I truly love the fact that _this_ version of our favorite unpredictable ninja is actually using his brain and playing to his best talents instead of basically pulling a jellyfish imitation and going where others push him.
I really think that the Hyuga Elders have found out just what level of damage Naruto will dish out when his precious people are in danger, and I will be looking forward to the next installment for the after action report.
One tiny little correction I notice that slipped by the proofreading, though. When Eleven is talking about Naruto's thought processes, his comment includes, "just because the root he takes is as straight as a corkscrew", and I'm pretty sure that it should have been "just because the route he takes is as straight as a corkscrew".
Anyway, keep up the great work, and I'm looking forward to the next installment.
Nementh
frankocsic posted a comment on Thursday 2nd September 2010 12:38pm
great read! good to see that sasuke's made a turnaround. loved it.
marcelhm posted a comment on Thursday 2nd September 2010 10:41am
good god this story is a fascinating read. I keep getting moments where I laugh my ass of only to look at parts and shake my head in dismay. (especially if I have a duh moment when naruto calls the Jonin Samurai)
to keep in style, I bow to you in respect and till next time!
louisjventer posted a comment on Thursday 2nd September 2010 7:12am
bloody awesome.i love this.hope formore sooner if you can.
shawn151 posted a comment on Wednesday 1st September 2010 10:20pm
Easily the greatest Naruto story I've ever read, except perhaps Viridian's story Team 8. Although to be fair, it has the advantage of being around long and thus having more chapters.
I love how everything seems to fit just right, and makes nothing unbelievable. I also enjoy the fact that your making some simple but obviously useful Jutsu's. Most people that make their own Jutsu's make huge flashy ones, that aren't really suitable for a ninja who should rely on stealth.
I also love the new personality you've given Naruto. It's clearly still Naruto, but he's matured just the way one would expect him too, if he was hanging out with adults. He's clearly still a bit childish, but no one can blame him cause he is only 12.
To be honest I'm kind of struggling here trying to put my awe into words. Your story is just so incredible and everything is so well done, I'm not quite sure what to say, but I've tried, and hopefully that's what counts.
Can hardly wait to see the next chapter. Hope it comes out before October, but if not oh, well. For a story of this quality, I don't mind waiting any amount of time.
kartal posted a comment on Wednesday 1st September 2010 8:06pm
Thank you so much for updating this. It's my favorite story of yours (though I like Hogwarts Dawn almost as much), and I love the direction you're going. I check this website frequently just to see if those two have been updated. Keep it up! P.S. This Naruto seems to dig kunoichi who take their career seriously, so how is he going to react to Temari? I'm also eagerly awaiting Gaara.
QOShea posted a comment on Tuesday 7th September 2010 5:17pm