White Knight, Grey Queen
7 - Consequences
Were Pansy and Harry dancing the paso?
Girl on girl action... I'm hoping for a Harry x Pansy x Ginny threesome! xD
Do you ever plan on doing the outtakes that you talked about?
Was going really well, but I just didn't like the fact that Pansy was sharing Harry with Ginny... The way you keep saying things like 'he wanted to dance with her' etc don't add up with the fact that you imply he only thinks about Pansey. Surely it would have been better to pair Ginny up with someone else, and leave Harry and Pansey to their own relationship,
I only got up to chapter 7, and if it changes then I apologise, but I couldn't that any longer.
Otherwise, your writing is brilliant; your characterisation and description are fantastic, and I was immesnly enjoying the story. However, I'll have to stop there (while I can normally ignore the romance in a story and concentrate on the plot if that aspect fails, this one seems to be centred around their relationships).
that was really good!!!
only one more chapter though...sob...
and dumbelydore following harry...totally didnt see that coming...
oh, i hope tonks doesnt die...
You were trying to tease your readers a bit in this chapter a bit, weren't you? First it's Ginny kissing Pansy and then it's that battle, if you can call it that. They're nice hints of what's to come, though.
I'll deal with Ginny first. I should start by admitting that I was partially spoiled by reviews I saw by accident when I was reviewing previous chapters, so when I saw the not-so-subtle hints in this chapter, I think I was able to figure out where you're heading finally. I have no idea why you would go there (the only things that are popping into my head are that Pansy gets what Pansy wants or that you're trying to show you're not beholden to any ship), but if I'm right, this was just a prelude. Still, I can appreciate how that kiss had the exact opposite effect one would naturally assume -- bringing Pansy, Ginny and Harry closer rather than driving them apart. Plus, how could anyone not enjoy a scene that ends with Ron being thrown in the lake?
The fight here strikes me as a prelude, too -- a meager taste of what's to come. After all that training you showed us, that was about as non-dramatic as it gets. What it did show is that the secondary characters can take care of themselves. But I'm definitely looking forward to when Harry and Pansy actually have to let loose what they've learned.
The other big thing I can't help noticing is that, other than Voldemort and company, you've eliminated all the opposition. You bring the Weasleys and Dumbledore on board, show that Harry is already calling the shots at the Ministry, and deal with everyone's favorite professors. In the case of Umbridge and Snape, I rather enjoyed the contrast between Pansy's vindictive vengeance and Harry's calm, organized, humiliating method of ousting Snape. It definitely fit the way you've been developing your characters right from the start.
It's Dumbledore pledge of loyalty at the end that surprised me most, though. I have a hard time seeing him ever giving up his ideals, even if means failure. Admittedly, though, that view is shaped considerably by HBP. Given that he's the puppet master you make him out to be, I could see how he would need to join Harry to remain in the game, to avoid being left out.
If I've got a complain at this point, it's that, like in TMW, this is coming together so fast. That's got to be a byproduct of how powerful and in control you've made Harry in both stories. It's fun -- makes for impressive moments and good comedy -- but it can make the buildup rather more complicated than the resolution. I can definitely tell why you go that way, though. You couldn't draw the stories out without compromising the level of detail.
Anyway, I'm rambling (again). But I'm definitely looking forward to how you finish this off.
Yay! Just... yay.
As always, you are one hell of a writer who should be writing professionaly (and I am fairly sure that's spelled wrong), and not for us poor, life-less people who hang onto your every *written* word. Anyway, I did notice that Neville called his grandmother "Nan" instead of "Gran" as it is in canon. Just thought I'd point that out. Oh, and I am anxiously awaiting TMW! Chapter 10, parts 2 and 3.
Was "I find you lack of faith..." a Star Wars reference?
“I don’t suppose you’d agree to let me put an insanity clause in there?” he asked, a hopeful expression on his face.
As Chico pointed out to Groucho, 'Everyone knows there such such thing as Insanity Clause.'
Pansy recounting the events of the night at the Ritz that made the girls sigh and Ginny’s makeover were both fantastic. I had to love Harry punching Snape and Pansy’s revenge on Umbridge. “Stupidest Wheezy” made me laugh as did Ginny kissing Pansy – too funny. 2nd favourite line had to be “Harry, ignore the slut please” which could be misinterpreted so beautifully. Absolute favourite bit was “Pure innocent witch” / “evil slutty witch” / “completely psycho wizard” being the oldest trick in the book. Loved that entire scene from beginning to end. Perfection.
Whoa! Plot twist! Still, good story so far. Very unique. Did you know that it won "Best All Around Fanfiction" at Darklordpotter.net? Yeah, it's pretty good at times. The Harry/Pansy pairing is original, if a bi fluffy for my tastes. Still, good job so far.
Ch.7 - - Harry the leader of the free wizarding Great Britain is an amazing creation of yours. I am delighted with how you've managed for him to take the best of Malcom and Grouch and add his Harry-ness to it, changing all three of the Parkinsons in the process.
Thank you also for bring the Weasleys and Dumbledore into the fold.
The interrogation scene was scary well done.
Oh, cool. Loved this chapter!
Man, what an excellent part. And you sure do write Ron well as an ass. I really dislike him.
Though I hope you're not going to turn it into a Harry Harem or a three-way, I'm really loving Ginny just being a good friend, and Harry and Pansy being all on their own as a couple.
Hehehehehe!! Such a sinister little ending. Finally, Harry has control, of EVERYTHING!! So sick. I find your story more than awesome, and I can't wait to finish it, although I have to say that leaving your realm of awesomeness will be a little sad.
i love your story and the polt is awesome.
love it hope you update soon and i love the way this stroy is going and i can't wait to see harrys reaction to what dumbledore has requested!!!
Great Story. Keep writing. I enjoy reading this story as you carn't find many good Harry & Pansy stories.
I love you! I'm serious. Ihaven't read any stories as good as thisin a long time, except for your other story, 'Wild Horses'. Please please pretty please wrie more?